Giant hogweed, the wrong trousers and strained relationships fail to prevent victory at Jesus

Jesus College, Cambridge 116 all out (Simon Rawson 4-29, Short 2-7)

Jesters CC 121-2 (Sachin Rawson 61*)

Won by 8 wickets

After a chastening defeat in last year’s fixture when the students of Jesus College seemed to be playing cricket from another planet, a more youthful squad was assembled for 2024, but it was an old timer who stole the show in a thumping win.

Simon Rawson took to the field in borrowed skintight trousers after forgetting his own and dispatching his wife to the nearest sports shop, but the extra tightness around his fragile hamstrings turned out to be performance enhancing as he came on first change to take 4-29 and completely transform the complexion of the game.

DJ ‘Nine Ten’ Chak was given a rare opportunity with the new ball to put the opposition under some early pressure, which he duly did, forcing their dangerous opener Max Loveridge into a false shot that spiralled high to mid-off.

Under the catch was Robbie Hudson, in the outfield rather than behind the stumps as he continued to recover from a long-term injury. Robbie was also sporting some irregular sportswear, a pair of chainmail oyster shucking gloves designed to protect a quite extraordinary new injury sustained playing golf earlier in the week. For those with a strong constitution, google ‘Giant hogweed burn’. Fortunately his Middle Aged look did not affect his poise under the high ball and the catch was calmly snaffled.

There followed a fascinating passage of play as Jesus gingerly made their way to 74-1 with returning ex-Jesus skipper Matt Griffiths beating the bat with regularity.

But it was Simon, bowling in tandem with the parsimonious Dheeraj (1-23 off 8 overs), who changed the momentum of the contest after the drinks break. He found his rhythm from the off, bowling a tight line with just enough movement to trouble the batsmen. It was a dramatic collapse as 92-2 became 116 all out, including a top class run out. Dheeraj’s bullet throw was picked up one-handed on the bounce by debutant Dougie Dolleymore who whipped off the bails in a flash to remove one of their better bats for a duck.

Andrew Short snared two late wickets, including the last man who was caught in the gully by Simon, denying himself what would have been a deserved five-for.

There was also a golden moment as Evie Miller, Matt Griffiths' girlfriend, came into bat for Jesus. The skipper immediately threw the ball to Matt, praying for an anecdote for the ages. It duly arrived second ball as Evie looped a catch back to the bowler. Time seemed to stand still as we all wondered what Matt would do. He opted, reluctantly, for ruthlessness. “You’re on the sofa tonight” was Evie’s brilliant response as she made her way back to the pavilion!

The college laid on a delicious tea before we began our chase in the worst possibly way, with Robbie pulling a long hop straight to backward square leg in the first over. However, a partnership of 73 between Sachin Rawson and Alex Smith (26) helped ease us home by eight wickets. Sachin finished on 61*, the first of twin half centuries over the Cambridge weekend, ending the match in style with a fourth six.

Jesters XI: Doward (c), Hudson, A Smith, Sachin Rawson, Dolleymore (wk), Chak, Standley, Griffiths, Dheeraj, Simon Rawson, Short